Here’s to the groom, and one for the bride

Sometimes I like to break tradition a little bit. In fact, truth be told I enjoy completely shattering it if necessary, whatever it takes. It all has to do with the overrated concept of tradition.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I have no problem with traditions, good and needed ones. Worthwhile ones with functions like Thanksgiving dinner, holiday family gatherings, and birthdays, as well as the precise morning routine of bathroom, teeth brushing, coffee, and the newspaper.  These are “traditions” that, to me, serve a purpose.

But too many times we tend to follow “tradition” just … well just because. Because that’s the way it has always been done. Never been a fan of that thought process, never been a fan of doing things "just because we have always done it this way."  Not the way I roll anyways.

So, with that as a preface, let me attempt to tackle one of the traditions we have taken for granted for way too long. It has to do with the grand tradition of marriage and more specifically the official wedding proceedings.

See if you’re with me. (Even if just a little bit)

At the highlight moment of the wedding ceremony, when the music starts to play and bride and father begin to make their grand entrance, where pray tell is the other half of the show, the groom? 

Usually, he is waiting in the front, stiffly and awkwardly standing at the end of the aisle near the stage along with the groomsman party.  They are all waiting, standing trying to look cool and calm, with uncomfortable smiles that could best be described as “plasticized”.

Wouldn’t it be better if the groom, too, got to walk down the aisle escorted by mom or dad?  Getting his moment to shine as well?

Not at the same time, of course, but separately. The groom could walk first, and the bride could follow suit as, no question, she is the star of the show. Let me repeat so there is no question as to the emphasis: The bride is the absolute star and she should make the last and grandest of entrances, I am all for that.

But can we give the groom a little bit of love too?  A little celebratory walk down the aisle so he too can bask in the glory of this once in a lifetime day? Thank you in advance for your cooperation.

Now let’s come to the defense of women in marriage. This has to do with losing their last name and taking the husband’s last name.  What a raw deal that is! Let me be the first to say that if the shoe were on the other foot, and I had to suddenly change my name, I would not be so accepting.

I understand it is a long and ingrained tradition, but sorry, if I were in the woman’s place, all my life I had a certain last name- and now because I am getting married -I have to change my name?

Sorry honey, but my name is my name and I ain’t changing it for you!

At the very, very least, call it my compromise solution, the children’s middle name should absolutely be the wife’s given last name. Forget about absurd middle names named after Grandpa Jack, or Aunt Martha, or Uncle Merle or some famous person. No!

The kid's middle name should be his mom’s family name. Keep the namesake alive.

And I don’t care if her last name was Kozlowski, or Morandini, or Suarez, or Liechtensteiner.  The kid will deal with it and know that he has part of mom in his god given name.