Top ten things worse than being at the post on April 15th

“Don’t wait till the last second”, “ Get those taxes done early this year”,  “ Whatever you do don’t wait till the last day”,   blah, blah, blah and more blah.

We have all been reminded of this many times, and yes, most of us go in with the plan to be ahead of schedule and “get those taxes done early”, this year— but nevertheless,  as the old saying goes, “ the best laid plans…” ( fill in the blank).

So, despite warnings and previous unpleasant experiences, many amongst us will trek over to our local post office on that dreaded April 15th day, and wait in line making sure to get the taxes paid before the penalty deadline.

For some it is almost a rite of passage.

Haven’t been to the post office on April 15th?  Let me try and paint a picture for the uninitiated:  Think three ring circus with a few more rings added just for good measure.

Maybe a school lunchroom on special “pizza day” might be a better description of the craziness, or sticking with the school theme, how about outdoor recess where the regular supervisor is out sick and the replacement doesn’t quite have control of things.

It is organized mayhem at its finest, with an emphasis on the mayhem and just a touch of “organized” sneaking through.

As the lines increase, and the tension packed deadline clock ticks away near midnight, it becomes almost an “every man for himself” scenario.  Pushing, shoving, yelling, screaming, they all are part of the fun festivities, and it becomes a no holds barred battle where, “only the strongest survive”.

Ok, maybe a little exaggeration in the above scenario, but only a little.

With all that said, and to the possible chagrin of all you last minuters out there, I tried to put together a list of TOP TEN THINGS THAT COULD BE WORSE THAN GOING TO THE POST OFFICE ON TAX DEADLINE DAY.

It wasn’t easy…but let’s give it a shot.

Number One: Having the root canal done and holding the Novocain.

Number Two: When the airplane you're flying in hits a particularly bumpy patch and the flight attendant comes on the speaker phone and says, “remember folks, your seat cushion can be used as a flotation device.”

Number Three: Listening to Paul Simon’s “Silly Love Songs” song on an endless loop.  Watch out Paul McCasrtney fans, I almost chose “Someone’s Knocking On The Door”, for this honor.

Number Four: Eating liver with…with…it really doesn’t matter what you’re eating it with, eating liver is disgusting!

Number Five: Getting stuck in Chicago traffic on Mexican Independence Day.

Number Six: Wife’s relatives come to visit for a long weekend, then decide to stay for the whole week!

Number Seven: On a road trip and the only gas station anywhere in sight as you get low on gas is called “ El Cheapo.” (had to put this in, because this happened to us recently) 

Number Eight: “ Survivor Season 12”.  Do we need to elaborate?

Number Nine: Getting a call from one of your children with the words, “Hi mom, don’t panic, but I am in the hospital.”

Number Ten: Getting an IRS notice in the mail with the words…” Your taxes are late and here is the penalty!”