Ask Candid Candace: Summer etiquette for Chicago's busiest season

Dear Candid Candace: I'm invited to a charity gala next month, but money is tight. If I buy a ticket, do I also have to bid in the auction or buy raffle tickets? I don't want to look cheap.

Signed: Feeling Guilty in Glenview

Dear Feeling Guilty:  Absolutely not. Purchasing a ticket already supports the organization and helps cover the cost of the event. Auctions, raffles and paddle raises are simply additional opportunities for guests who are able to give more.

The best guests aren't necessarily the biggest spenders. They're the ones who arrive on time, dress appropriately, engage with others and show genuine enthusiasm for the cause. If your budget allows for an auction bid, wonderful. If not, enjoy the evening without guilt.

One more tip: If you can't attend after purchasing your ticket, let the organization know as early as possible. They may be able to resell your seat, and they'll certainly appreciate the courtesy.

Dear Candid Candace:  Everywhere I go this summer, people are filming everything for social media. At restaurants, concerts and even private parties, someone always has a phone pointed at everyone else. Is it rude to ask not to be posted online?

You may also like these related Chicago Star articles: 

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• Ask Candid Candace: Trouble with contractors and tips for how to get the family to enjoy a baseball game

• Ask Candid Candace: Wife turned off when husband is online

Signed: Camera Shy in Chicago

Dear Camera Shy: Not at all. Privacy never goes out of style. A simple, friendly "I'd rather not be in photos or videos, thanks!" is perfectly acceptable. Most people aren't trying to invade your privacy. They're just caught up in documenting the moment.

For those doing the posting, remember that not every gathering is content. Before sharing photos from a private party or small dinner, ask if everyone is comfortable being featured. It takes only a few seconds, and it's a thoughtful gesture that friends will appreciate.

The best memories are still made by being present, not by worrying about the perfect Instagram reel. Put the phone down once in a while, savor the conversation and enjoy the moment. Trust me, those are the memories that last.

(Ask Candid Candace is sponsored by Randolph Street Market. Don't miss the next market this weekend, July 24/25.)  

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